What Happy Looks Like

 

This time last year my husband, Randy and I were on our way to NC to celebrate our 32nd wedding anniversary. Instead of going skiing we ended up at the nearest ER where Randy was transported to another hospital for emergency surgery- his appendix had ruptured. 

The morning of our anniversary I arrived at the hospital expecting to take him home, but he wasn’t doing well due to a complication which had occurred during surgery. Instead of going home and back to life as we knew it- this was the day we found out he had cancer. He was diagnosed with a rare and aggressive stage 4 appendix cancer. 

This February 18th we’ll be married 33 years, but the celebration began on February10th when Randy rang the bell signifying the end of chemo. It was an emotional moment and physical relief. 

Our son, Jordan took this photo after we returned home that day. This is what happy looks like! I’ve no idea what the future holds, but I’m trying to appreciate and never take for granted moments like this one. 

Happy Valentine's Day! 

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Time goes by so quickly. It’s busy at our house. I’ve been writing – just not Blogging. I had a group of neighbor kids over and they were my Focus Group for some of the activities I’ve incorporated into my school program curriculum. My teenagers videotaped the event and the kids were so wonderful and well behaved that I couldn’t help but think anyone watching would think it was staged. But…then one child announced that her entire family was crazy and another agreed and told us that her friend’s Daddy put crayons up his nose.

My little focus group ranged from pre-K to 4th Grade. We read my children’s book, played games, discussed cancer, and talked about how it affected families. I didn’t have to define cancer to a single child because they knew what it was and several had experienced it first hand because a family member had been diagnosed with cancer.

Yesterday, in the midst of planning Nutcracker Publishing’s 2nd Annual Easter Egg, Hunt for a Cure, I stopped to watch Democratic presidential contender, John Edwards and his wife Elizabeth’s press conference regarding her recurrence of breast cancer.

It’s been 13 years since I was diagnosed with Breast Cancer and I still feel queasy when I step into any doctor’s office for a routine breast exam or blood work.

Elizabeth Edwards was candid, gracious, and handling her recurrence of breast cancer with what I know to be a Cancer-tankerous Mommy’s attitude. She’s not going to be waiting to die, but instead is hitting the rode for her husband, and campaigning with cancer.

She’s not wallowing in pity either and I know cancer survivors everywhere sighed with relief when she announced her plans to continue to campaign.

Her honesty and candor about her breast cancer has helped so many families. Like the families of the children in my focus group.

A couple of years ago, it would have been unimaginable for me to invite the neighbor kids over for a school program party with a focus on cancer, much less enter a public school and talk to elementary students about cancer. Back when I was diagnosed with breast cancer, talking about it to my own young children was not exactly encouraged, and most well meaning adults tiptoed around the issue.

Next year I'll officially introduce Crack Open a Book©, Nutcracker Publishing’s Character Education School Program and I’ll be talking to elementary students about CANCER.

Thanks to the courage of women like Elizabeth Edwards the only tiptoeing around the issue I’ll do is a Cancer-tankerous inspired game called, Tiptoe to Mama.

I wish Rosie O Donnell would pick on me; I could use the publicity.

Many of you know that in October of 2001, I won what for any writer, much less an unknown, one-woman independent self-publisher, was the equivalent of winning the lottery- an appearance to promote my book, Tickles Tabitha’s Cancer-tankerous Mommy on the Rosie O Donnell Show.

Suddenly I went from being the town idiot, who’d invested hard-earned money to start a business she knew absolutely nothing about, so she could publish a children’s book-- God forbid-- about a mean ole Mommy with CANCER, to a nationally recognized Expert.

I was still teetering to obtain balance on the publicity pedestal when I got knocked off and onto my butt by the Anthrax virus. Anthrax had been found in NBC studios at Rockefeller Plaza where the O Donnell show aired and my appearance was cancelled.

It was devastating, humiliating, and a crushing blow to my mother, mother-in-law, and other significant others who’d bragged to their friends about my upcoming appearance.

It was an even bigger disappointment for all those pretend friends, snooty relatives, and colleagues (you know who you are) who were hoping to see me make a fool of my self on national television.

As for me my non-appearance on the Rosie O Donnell Show was the best publicity my book and publishing company has ever received.

A press release about my non appearance was picked up by the wire and I got calls from across the country. I didn’t make it to NYC but my book did and O Donnell recommended it on her show and gave copies to her studio audience.

Today I realize an endorsement from Rosie is just too old school. I've concluded the best thing Rosie O Donnell could do for an author is insult them publicly.

I'm no longer aspiring to guest on The View instead all I ask is that Rosie say she hates Tickles Tabitha's Cancer-tankerous Mommy and the witch who wrote it.

Come on Rosie, feud with me.

I’ve got several thousand copies of Tickles Tabitha’s Cancer-tankerous Mommy I’d like to sell. Not to mention, the "real" Tickles Tabitha is all grown up and with a few nasty remarks from you, I might could afford to send her to college.